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  • Writer's picturePaul Hopkins

The sex was great, but there was more to it.

Ultimately here is a question and that question will lead to an answer. The problem is, do you want to answer the question.

Just because you had an affair does not mean that you are a nymphomaniac and always on the prowl for sex.

I think a lot of the time it is quite different. An affair can also be a deep meaningful connection. The problem here is that because the connection is so great, so is the sex.

Great sex and connection are linked. This makes the transition to normality even harder. Do-able but hard.

The hard part is honesty. When you are asked do you love your marital partner, most of the answers would be yes. Unless your relationship has become so bitter with resentment that anything they say or do is just irritating. If that is the case well, you may be too late.

If you were asked do you love your marital partner and your affair partner the answer would be yes.

If you were asked can you love two people the answer may be yes? But wait! Can you love two the same way?

Oo there is a question.

These unfortunately are the complexities of an affair.

So what is the answer. the answer really is at the very begining and even before that.

It is all about not opening yourself up to another person who you could be attracted to.

But believe me, that is very hard to do. When you are in a room with a p[erson you just know you connect with but to not open up to is very difficult. The trouble is when you do the attachment starts, and that's the feeling, right?

But back to sex and it was more than that.

It was more than that. It was a connection. Fools gold? I don't know.

So where am I now after such an all-consuming emotional affair with a person that has marked my soul forever?

Well, I try to find that connection with my wife. The trouble is my wife is harder to connect to. So how do I cope with that. It can be hard but I try to accept that she is she. I do feel that at times she (without knowing) may deny that connection and the effort I put in to make it better. But I accept that she is different from me, with a different upbringing.

The bottom line is I want a connection. That connection expands the pleasures of a relationship. I want to be in that zone of banta, laughter, hobbies, tears, and much more.

Sharing is caring and to be able to care life should be shared.

Connection brings high level sexual context.

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