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  • Writer's picturePaul Hopkins

The barriers to relationships!

What does go on in the mind of the betrayed?

I know what goes on in mine, as the betrayer. But today is about them!

How is the betrayed - 2 months, 1 year, 3 years, or 5 years later?

What are the regrets? Are there any regrets?

What are your worries?

I know what mine are?

I worry about complacency and falling into the same traps as yester year.


• Work, tv, bed

• Same again tomorrow

• Not taking time to talk

• Not spending time in each others world

Do we learn from the past. God I hope so.

I would like to understand what the betrayed thinks as time passes.

Are you fearful? Worried that there may be another trigger?

I know that I still ponder the past.

As I sit in the garden and the warm breeze wafts across me, I often wonder back to what happened, and what's changed.

But then again, I am one of lifes great thinkers! I also ponder about life being easier, and just not thinking! But the truth is I like to feel and think and learn and grow!

One thing I know and that is, there are barriers to relationships.

If you sit down and think about one barrier that hinders your relationship today, what would it be?

My answer would be routine! Or that me and my partner are so different.

But I try not to focus on the differences. But rather the qualities.

However I do miss dancing!

If you would like to comment please do. We are all here to help each other. You might say something that is so valuable to someone elese.

Stay strong and dance on.

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Nov 19, 2022

I think talking about your affair is very brave. I think many others can relate, whether they want to admit it or not. Many of us have at least had thoughts about it, and many have of us have had affairs but feel a sense of shame to talk about it, outside of coming clean to your partner. I think being vulnerable and sharing is valuable to many. It makes us feel less alone and less like a failure. For those that have been brave enough to share with others (beyond your partner) has the talking to a wider audience been helpful to both you and your partner?

Paul  Hopkins
Paul Hopkins
Jan 05, 2023
Replying to


Thanks for your comment. So sorry I missrd it, otherwise I would have replied earlier.

My focus was to help others via an understanding, if possible and hopefully that is the case.

To be honest it has not been easy talking about some of the subjects as you are deffinately branded.

There was deffinately a sense of shame, however the more I talk about it and understand it the more the shame dissappeared.

I am so pleased you find it valuable as sometimes I wonder.

Talking about it in a wider place has definitely helped me. It has helped me learn and analyse rather than just beat myself up.

My partner has found ot useful because I write it…

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